• My favorite part of Peyton’s bedroom refresh is her art from @sheisthisdesigns! I need to order more for Harper’s room and my new office space. I dreamed of having a room like Peyton’s when I was growing up (sometimes now 😆). She’s also has a closet to die for.  I always tell her if she can’t keep it clean, I’m putting my stuff in there.  We’ll be cleaning that out soon! Paint color is Revere Pewter by Benjamin Moore.  More room pics on the blog. Link in profile. #heytrinashome
  • Picture of my girls actually fighting against doing any school work.  This homeschooling thing is a full time job! Mr has locked himself in my old office leaving me to fend for myself. I’ve decided to give the girls and myself grace (and 🍷). Not that I’m letting them win, after hours of going back and fourth I have to know when to call it a day.  One night I was up with Peyton till almost 10 helping her finish her work and I knew this can’t be life.  So we’re working about 2-3 hrs a day on school plus reading.  That’s all i got.  Just praying  she passes 4th grade 😩. How’s it going for you guys? #graceandmercy shirts fine @pintsizefaith
  • Another project under my quarantine belt! Peyton’s pre-tween bedroom refresh is done! It looks so good and matches the vibe of the rest of the house. Peyton wanted to kick the bright pinks to the curb. Now Harper wants her room update 😒. Her only update will be a good cleaning 😩. Spent less than $100. Swipe to see the before that was already cute. Links to everything on the blog (link in profile) #heytrinashome
  • Spring is here but no spring break 😓. Just over here washing my hands, trying to stay positive and plotting where I’m going when this is all over. Homeschool was a fail this week but I did finish my new Supermomculture.com site, set up my new workspace and deep cleaned my kitchen.  Currently happy hour at the crib. Can’t wait to rock this @suakokobetty outfit again.
  • My 2nd quarantine project is complete! So y’all remember that cute office I had.... well Mr stole it a few years ago even though it has pink accents 😒. My pictures are still on the wall an everything.  Since then, my main office has been the kitchen counter with my laptop. How am I supposed to run a multi-thousand dollar business from the counter? Being a blogger is one thing but having a retail business is another beast. I have a computer in my guest room where I package orders but it was on a small writers desk with no room for papers or anything.  It was getting too hectic. So I switched the room around to make more space to fulfill orders and work. I shopped my basement to put it together. I super excited to have a new space where I can leave my papers and planners. My desk is the Linnmon desk from Ikea. I already had 2 of these tables that are on the other side of the printer for @supermomculture orders. PS: while I’m being productive my kids aren’t 🤷🏾‍♀️
  • Trying not to come out of this self quarantine 50lbs heavier.  The girls and I did a 30 min Tabata and they are now doing hip hop routines on YT.  I wrote a post last year sharing my favorite free home workouts.  Visit the blog and search workouts or watch my stories for swipe up.  Doing my best to stay busy and being productive cuz after cleaning my kitchen, I haven’t done anything else 😩. Outfit from @jdowfitness #homeworkouts
  • Speed kitchen deep clean! Taking this time to get my home in order. I used several products including my favorite stainless steel wipes. I used a mixture of warm water and vinegar to clean the floors by hand. There are a lot of ways you can disinfect with what you have at home since everyone finally decided to clean up now. I’m also counting this as my home workout 🏋🏾‍♀️
  • Let’s play a game! Since 2020 is turning out to be the “Ghetto” I want to know what you do that would be considered “Ghetto”. I know we act all bougie on the internets but I know there’s something we do that we know would be frowned upon. Set yourself free and tell me in the comments.  I may pick a winner who makes me clutch my pearls... maybe a @supermomculture tee 🤔. I’ll leave mine in the comments 😆 📷 @kaynjames
  • Channeling my inner Supermom powers during this time to clean this house from top to bottom. I’m starting with a kitchen deep clean. Then it’s on to bathrooms, the girl’s rooms, closets and my workspace.  I’ve ordered Mr to paint the guest room, y’all know how that goes 🙄. It’s the last room in the house that hasn’t been painted. Get ready for a lot of home content since I’m stuck here. Let me know what y’all want to see. #springcleaning #heytrinashome
  • Working for yourself can be overwhelming during tax time.  #AD Instead of being stressed out, I headed to @HRblock to meet with one of their tax experts.  My tax pro Darshna was awesome.  She answered all of my questions and gave me some great tips for my personal and business taxes. I plan to use my refund to invest back into my business (and maybe a few pairs of shoes). Save time with convenient hours and get upfront pricing.  Use code 69539 to save on your tax preparation fees at @hrblock . #betterwithblock
  • It's our 1 year anniversary of Supermom Culture.  One year ago I pushed post with a slight panic attack to share a tee and a hoodie that I didn't know if anyone would like, let alone buy.  When they say you have to do it scared, it’s true! I've always wanted to create something fun, cool and comfortable that represents what I stand for.  Thousands of shirts sold and we’re just getting started! I want to thank you guys for all the support via likes, follows, tags and photo shoots.  This movement wouldn't be what it is if it wasn't for you guys. There is more to come for Supermom Culture to celebrate you guys!  Be on the lookout for new drops and live events! Black on Black is now back in stock!  To celebrate I have a special deal when you buy one, get a tee 25% off! If you don’t have one, go ahead and save on the black and white tee. No code needed!  Link in profile. Love y’all!
Anniversary Mamanista Marriage Parenting

Black Love: What I’ve Learned From 10 Years of Marriage

October 30, 2017

I’m still on a high from celebrating my 10 year anniversary. We enjoyed a wonderful night of wine and dining in Buckhead. Mister is known to pull out the romantic stops and he did not disappoint. It seriously felt like our wedding night again. I’m not gonna lie but I feel like I have a little marriage swag now that I’ve hit 10 years happily married. I’m not saying that my marriage has been perfect all 10 years. We’ve had some bumps in the road along the way dealing with communication, family, and finances. I’m happy to report that I am more in love with this man today than I have ever been. With no examples of #BlackLove around me, it is by God’s grace that I’m here. I thought I would share what I’ve learned over the years that have kept our love strong and growing. Materialistic items are great, but the things I’m about to mention are much more important.

  • Don’t compare your marriage to other marriages. I see the hashtag #RelationshipGoals on every photo of a good looking couple kissing. You don’t know what people have gone through to get there or if you’re willing to do it. My husband is an angel, so I give him most of the credit for our happy marriage and follow his lead. Everyone is different and our tolerance levels are different. I also don’t stay mad long so my husband lucked out with that.
  • Have sex often. Sex is a big part of a marriage. If you’re not having sex, you’re going to have problems. My husband would like it daily but we have settled on a realistic amount of times per week. Sometimes we hit that number, sometimes we don’t but we try. If either of you aren’t quite in the mood, perhaps adult content from somewhere like Tube v Sex could be used to try and get both of you sexually excited.

Shirts from Brand Ave Clothing

  • Initiate sex. We don’t always have to wait to for men tap us on the shoulder. Sometimes we should take the initiative. Everyone wants to feel wanted and desired, that includes our husbands. Sometimes it might even be a good idea to spice up the bedroom with a silicone love doll but talk to him about it first, communication is import for any sexual explorations.
  • Practice random acts of kindness. I love nothing more than to get a text in the middle of the day from my husband telling me he loves me and that I’m a great mom even though when he left me I had on ratty sweats and a bonnet on my head. I’ve followed his lead by sending him random I love you texts and messages of appreciation.
  • Pick your battles. This is super important. I don’t have the time and energy to fight everything that I don’t agree with. I save that for the big ones. Fighting every little thing is exhausting and will come off as nagging. I just say “If you think that’s best” so if it fails, he’ll know the next time *wink*!
  • Everything isn’t always 50/50. As mothers, we carry most of the load of the household and children. It is what it is. My husband works a lot and I hold it down while he’s gone. I get frustrated about mom life but when he’s home he tries his best to take things off my plate. We just need to make sure we schedule some much needed self care time away from the family to recharge.
  • Be your husbands biggest cheerleader. My husband says that I’m really good at this. I was a cheerleader in high school soooo. We need to continue to uplift our men because if we don’t who will (besides thots lol!).
  • Tackle problems together. It can be hard but try your best to work as a team when your families face challenges. We’ve dealt with unemployment and financial hardships a few times since we got married. There were times when I had to hold it down and vice versus. Now I’m at home with the girls. If I had to (I don’t want to) I would go back to work if needed. We’re a team.
  • Read the 5 Love Languages. Every couple should read this book. I read this book for a book club when I was just dating Mister. It really helps you understand that everyone feels loved in different ways. You’ll notice changes when you start speaking your partners love language.
  • Look at yourself. This ties in with love languages. What are you doing to make the marriage better? What could you be doing differently? If things don’t work out, at least you know you tried.
  • Don’t be selfish. You can’t be selfish in a marriage. Coincidently at church this Sunday, they were wrapping up the series of what Happy Couples Know. It basically boils downs to happy couples give and love without expecting anything in return. We both give 100% regardless of what we think the other is doing.
  • Marriage doesn’t change people. One of the biggest choices you make in marriage is who you marry. If the person you decide to marry is selfish before marriage, it will be magnified once you are married. Walking down the aisle doesn’t make things go away.

If you would have shared these things with me before meeting Mister, I would have been like “Girl, please! He better do this, this and this. I’m not doing this or that.” I have grown so much since meeting my husband. I always say he’s my angle because I think he’s perfect (90% of the time). He makes me want to be a better person. He says the same about me and I don’t know why. Back to my church sermon, they said that happy couples continue to think more of the other person than themselves.

I’m not sharing all this the brag about how in love I am but to encourage others. Black Love is amazing but we have to want it and work for it. I’ve shared stories about my relationship with my father that was only the last 2 years of his life. I never saw any positive examples of black love. God sent me my husband and I knew I didn’t want to mess it up. I don’t claim to be the perfect wife. I’ve made mistakes, I’ve tried to learn from them. Getting married is easy, staying married is the hard part. I hope this post helps or encourage someone.

I’ll be sharing answers to your relationship questions soon. I promise I’m not turning into a “wife” coach but I’ve kissed a lot of frogs and dogs so I know bad relationships very well. I to share and I would be wrong if I didn’t share this. Please feel free to share your marriage tips in the comments. Feel free to share this post.

  • Narisa Lloyd
    October 30, 2017 at 2:20 pm

    This post was right on time, thank you!🙏🏽

  • Kim Lucretia Edwards
    October 30, 2017 at 3:05 pm

    Well written piece! Loved it. Was very helpful

  • Ima
    October 30, 2017 at 3:16 pm

    So good!!!! Honest and a great reminder for us newer wives 🙂

  • Ivory Toomer
    October 30, 2017 at 5:30 pm

    You are so real and honest. I love that about you and your blog. You are my BFF in my head. We even share the same Anniversary. Ours is 10-27-12. Keep going and being real! Sometimes

  • Buzybeekm
    October 30, 2017 at 5:34 pm

    Thanks for sharing and being so transparent! I couldn’t agree more with all of your advice.

  • Bobbie
    October 30, 2017 at 7:19 pm

    Trina, I’m not married-yet, but I will definately keeo your advice in the fore front of my mind when my time comes around. Thank you for always being so transparent

  • Cristine
    October 31, 2017 at 11:14 am

    This is so helpful. As a newlywed, we’re enjoying both the newlywed bliss and drama LOL. Thank you for sharing and being transparent! Happy 10 Years to you and your husband. <3

  • Kesha
    October 31, 2017 at 2:33 pm

    Excellent advice! Loved it!

  • Ayana
    November 1, 2017 at 6:08 pm

    YES!!!!! Such great advice!!

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