It’s been 7 years since I lost my mom. Her birthday was yesterday. She would have been 88. Every birthday and holiday it hits me. Sometimes I’m sad and sometime I’m celebratory because I had the gift of an amazing mother.
I wanted to share a few things that I learned from my mom even though she grew up in the “hush” era and parents sometimes didn’t view children as people, just kids.
- Being a good friend. My mom was the homegirl! She made friends everywhere she went. Everyone loved her. She was sweet, caring and someone you could count on. I never heard her be mean to anyone.
- Show up as your best self. My mom was a baddie before we even knew what a baddie was. She would be styled from head to toe. Hair, nails, outift, shoes, purse, everything was fire! She was the “It’s better to be overdressed, than to be under dressed”
- Take risks. My mom didn’t play it safe. She just didn’t talk about what she was going to do, she did it. In her early 20s with two small kids, she moved from rural Mississippi to Chicago. We’re talking in the early 60’s. She left and took her chances in the big city.
- Don’t settle. My mom wasn’t going to take crumbs. If you tried to short change her she would tell you to keep it and get it herself. She carried her self to a high standard.
- Forgive yourself. This one is big to me. My mom made some mistakes. My mom was married when she had me, just not to my dad. Instead of shrinking and disappearing, she owned it. She didn’t let shame and guilt take over her life. She prayed about it, asked for forgiveness, left it at the alter and moved on. So many of us let our mistakes define our life. She truly believed that Jesus died for our sins. She doesn’t have to carry that cross.
My mom was special. As much as my heart still aches from missing her, I love celebrating her. I wouldn’t be who I am today without her. She is the best of me. That was my girl.
